Hello Everyone,
It's been awhile but I'm here now. I'm thankful for the few of you who still have an interest in my ramblings. I'm not sure what all I've shared regarding recent goings on so here's an update. I did finally get my disability and now have all my medical taken care of. I'm able to live alone and be self sufficient. Self sufficient in all ways except transportation. And since I'm outside of Omaha now, there isn't a transportation system to get me to local appointments. Thankfully I'm able to get a ride for most errands. I also now have 3 local grandchildren who are also a great source of joy for me.
You would think I would be more appreciative. Instead I find myself struggling daily, sometimes all day with depression, helplessness and without any lasting joy. I find myself not wanting to get outside at all even when I do have a ride. I feel lost and honestly, very lonely. For the past 8 years I've learned to isolate quite effectively and that's not a good thing for me. I've managed to pull away from loved ones and friends to the point where I really don't hear from anyone anymore. Sometimes that bothers me, but mostly it bothers me that I've become comfortable with it.....usually.
I'm sharing this with you for several reasons. First of all, I need prayer. Prayer to have the desire and strength to get out of my little shell and the transportation to make it possible. Secondly, by sharing with you my struggles, maybe it will help someone else to reach out and ask for help. Lastly, I like to be honest about myself. I struggle with keeping myself upright sometimes. I have days where I don't hardly leave my room. Medically, my doctors are trying to get me the help my body needs but my emotional and spiritual health is sadly in need of radical help.
So there it is. This is me asking for help. I need prayer warriors. I started reading in Phillipians today. The verse that stuck out the most was 1:6 "For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus." All hope is not lost....I really do know this, but sometimes the road is really long. Until next time, Be Wise, Be Kind, Be True.......Love, Patty